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THE CHIVALROUS SHARK

(learned from Song Fest in the 1960s)

(music to go here)

Most chivalrous fish of the ocean,
To ladies forbearing and mild,
Though his record be dark, is the man-eating shark,
Who will eat neither woman nor child.

He dines upon seamen and skippers,
And tourists his hunger assuage,
And a fresh cabin boy will inspire him with joy
If he's past the maturity age.

A doctor, a lawyer, a preacher,
He'll gobble one any fine day
But the ladies, God bless 'em, he'll only address 'em
Politely and go on his way.

I can readily cite you an instance
Where a charming young lady of Bream
Who was tender and sweet, and delicious to eat,
Fell into the bay with a scream.

She struggled and flounced in the water,
And signaled in vain for her bark,
And she'd surely have drowned if she hadn't been found
By a chivalrous man-eating shark.

He bowed in a manner most polished,
Thus soothing her impulses wild.
Don't be frightened, he said, I've been properly bred,
And will eat neither woman nor child.

Then he proffered his fin, and she took it,
Such a gallantry none can dispute.
And the passengers cheered, as the vessel they neared,
And a broadside was fired in salute.

They stood alongside of the vessel,
While a life-saving dinghy was lowered,
With the pick of the crew, and her relatives too,
And the mate and the skipper aboard.

They took her aboard in a jiffy,
The shark at attention the while.
Then he rose on his flipper, and ate up the skipper,
And went on his way with a smile.

Thus proving the prince of the ocean,
To ladies forbearing and mild,
Though his record be dark, is the man-eating shark,
Who will eat neither woman nor child.

(from miriam berg's folksong collection)